CHRISTIAN FREAKOUTS!–Hallow(SATAN!)een

With Halloween coming up, I’ve been flipping through a lot of Christian blogs, which are talking about whether or not the holiday is okay for Christians to celebrate. The answer is a resounding “HALLOWEEN IS AN EVIL SATAN MUSLIM HOLIDAY WHERE BABIES ARE RITUALLY ABORTED TO THE TUNE OF RECORDS PLAYED BACKWARDS!!”

Yeah, kind of like that.

I actually want to be careful here because there’s a nugget of truth in some of their claims. The problem I have is it’s really just that: a nugget, and the reasons Christians have against Halloween really don’t stand up very well.

So I want to examine and deconstruct the 5 biggest problems Christians have with Halloween.

IT’S A SATANIC HOLIDAY! It’s actually true, a bunch of Druids started the holiday as a celebration of evil and death. The Catholics tried to Christianize it, but that worked about as well as any thing with the phrase “Christianize.” So, yeah, Halloween was created as an evil, unChristian holiday.

In 1412.

It’s 2012. How many people do you know who dance around graves, drinking blood and giving homage to Lucifer? That’s right. ONE, the wierdo in the cemetery. The rest of the world eats candy.

Yeah, for a Christian to be playing with the occult (wee-gee boards, or however you spell it…seances, magic, summoning spirits, etc) is bad any time of year, not just Halloween! Playing with evil spirits is dangerous and you can invite some very nasty stuff if you open your mind to it.

But to think that one day is more evil than any other is ludicrous. Days are neutral forces, only made holy or evil by what is done. Did you know December 25th is no holier than any other day? It’s just the day we celebrate Christ’s birth, and it’s the celebration that makes the day good.

In summary, yes, Halloween had satanic origins. But how much of that do you honestly still see?

IT CELEBRATES FEAR! This is probably the truest of the anti-Halloween claims, but notice the operative “est.” It’s a time for scary stories, creepy decorations, door spiders that jump out at you, and pathetically gory horror movies. Generally speaking, I’m against horror because I don’t think it’s good to let true fear into our lives, and most stories are more gory than scary. But there are two stipulations.

One: fear is subjective. I have a book called House, which is a Christian horror story. There are thrills and terrors, but they serve the purpose of telling a Christian story. I love it, and it doesn’t truly scare me. However, when my friend tried reading it, his head was filled with fear and darkness. I told him to stop reading it if that was the case. What scares me (clowns) might not scare you.

Number two is I think there can be a healthy kind of fear. A thrill and a chill can be fun without being evil as long as it’s not inviting anything bad in. A little darkness can create a great mood of fear and despair, but when it is overcome, it’s all the more powerful.

We shouldn’t be afraid of the darkness, rather we as Christians should know how to conquer it.

IT CELEBRATES GLUTTONY! Um, no. Gluttony is a lifestyle. Halloween lasts one night.

Besides, have you heard of Thanksgiving, or better yet, Christmas? You want to talk about gluttony, examine those holidays!

Oh, look, another clown.

THERE ARE BAD PEOPLE OUT THERE WHO WANT TO HURT AND POISON OUR KIDS! No. No there aren’t. There hasn’t been a candy poisoning in ages, and that was done by the child’s own parent! But we’ve allowed one incident to scare us out of letting out kids out of our sight.

That’s why I’m not up for Trunk-or-Treat, these Christian things where we have a safe, cozy Halloween in a Chick-Fil-A parking lot. Come on, parents, you want to protect your kids, then walk with them. Don’t live a life in fear that everyone wants to kill or kidnap your kids because guess what, most people don’t.

Your only scaring your children more.

THE COSTUMES ARE UN-CHRISTIAN! Yeah, there’s no way I was going to find an appropriate picture for this one.

Let’s say what we already know: Halloween is the perfect time to see a lot of T & A. Sexualized costumes are rampant and yes, you don’t want your little boys looking down the cleavage of every single candy-cane stripper that walks by, or your little girls looking up at them and thinking that’s what’s expected of them.

But if you’re a Christian, why are you that worried about these costumes? How about don’t buy them? How about don’t let your kids wear them? How about talking to them why those costumes are wrong instead of leaving them to figure the world out on their own? Yes, the costumes are degrading to women, but we have to fix the people, not the costumes. Start with your children.

But there’s another group that says dressing up like a witch is evil because the Bible says not to have such things even named among you. When’s the last time you saw a woman in a black gown and a pointed hat and thought she was ACTUALLY a witch?

And by that logic, anyone who ever played Satan in a Jesus play or movie is going to Hell for making himself evil.

So What Do We Do? To be perfectly honest, when it comes to Halloween, I have little advice to give to Christian families other than what is obvious:

  • Don’t worship Satan or mess around with the occult.
  • Occasional candy indulgence is good, but use discipline to fight off the Diabetes Gnomes.
  • Ladies, if you want to wear a sexy costume for your husband, make sure he’s the ONLY one who sees it.
  • Same for you, gentlemen. I don’t want to see you in a Speedo and neither does the world.
  • Keep your kids safe, but don’t be paranoid.
  • Thrills and chills are fun, but use wisdom to know when it’s no longer a game and it’s actually affecting you.
  • If you go to a party, don’t get smashed (either by alcohol or a big hammer, they’re both unpleasant)

So use wisdom this October 31st. As with many thing in Christianity, if in doubt, don’t do it. Paul says in 1 Corinthians to mind your conscience, but also the conscience of others. If it causes your brother to stray from God, it’s best not to go there.

But as for me and my house…we Trick-or-Treat.

Happy Halloween! (Not the Satan kind, the fun, candy kind)

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7 thoughts on “CHRISTIAN FREAKOUTS!–Hallow(SATAN!)een

  1. I thought Halloween came from “All Hallow’s Eve”, the day before All Saints, which is a holy day of obligation (meaning you go to church). It was celebrated as All Souls, depending on the tradition you followed, either to honour those about to become Saints, pray for all dead, or dress up to scare away the dead who were loosed from purgatory for that day only, for whatever reason. As for me an my household, we dress up and eat chocolate. No vandalism.

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    1. I’ve heard about All Hallow’s Eve, but I also heard two different stories. One is that it was an attempt to Christianize the devil worshiping holiday. The other was that the druids came in AFTERwards to mock All Hallow’s Eve. I honestly don’t know, but I’m glad you have no plans for vandalism! Happy non-evil-candy-and-costume-day! haha

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      1. Nope, All Soul’s (aka All Hallow’s Eve) does come on Oct 31, the holy day of All Saints being Nov 1. I’m not positive about the story either, mostly I think the vandalizing came about when England broke away from the Catholic Church and non-Catholics thought it would be fun to antagonize the Catholics before a feast day.

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  2. The story of Halloween and its origins and the way different cultures celebrate it now and through the ages is fascinating. If you can find a copy of The Halloween Tree, it’s a /great/ movie. Aimed at kids, but very educational.

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  3. “And by that logic, anyone who ever played Satan in a Jesus play or movie is going to Hell for making himself evil.” Haha! Thank you for your frankness and honesty. My family and church didn’t allow celebrating Halloween. I used to follow along, but now I’m frustrated with the mindset you described. Now you’ve given me some thoughts and words to put to my misgivings.

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    1. Ha, well I’m not for dividing people, I just want people to realize why they believe what they do. If you’re under the authority of your church, I’d advise you to not do Halloween just as an act of obdedience to them, but if not, do as you will.

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