Obviously, it’s not true, but part of my job as an intern is to search through WordPress’s Christian section most every day (don’t envy me, they pay me in prayers) and while I’ve noticed a good hunk of posts about marriage and children and families in general, there’s remarkably little being said on dating.
One of my biggest ministry areas is marriage and family, but the part of marriage the Christians usually forget about is everything that happens before the wedding: the engagement, the dating, the meeting, even way back to the first desire to ever marry or even date. That’s where the ministry truly starts.
As a married Christian who has dated and
stalks observes Christians who date, I thought I’d give my advice. Starting today, I’m going to have a weekly post about Christian dating, trying to hit all the bases that I can. These posts will try to be shorter than my normal fare, save for this one because of this rambling introduction turtles Cheez-its washboard Yahtzee.
My goal for these posts is to hit the general principles because I can’t go case-by-case. The benefit there is that these should be able to apply to a wide range of people: those who are dating, engaged, or wish to date, as well as talking to both men and women.
That’s enough introduction, let’s hop right into the very first principle:
GET STRONG WITH GOD.
Generic, I know, but hear me out.
For a Christian, a relationship with God is the most important thing in any aspect of your life. What did Jesus say was the greatest commandment? To love God with all your heart, soul, mind, and strength. Nothing else comes before this, not even your loved ones.
My wife dated a guy who had a problem with this. My wife had been in a dry spell spiritually for a very long time, but finally she felt the light of God shining down on her again, so she quickly told her boyfriend, positively bubbling over with excitement.
His response? “Oh, now that you have God, I guess you don’t need me.”
Wow. Kind of emo, innit? He simply couldn’t handle my wife loving anybody besides himself, not even the God he claimed to serve.
I make jokes about dating, but if you start out loving this person more than God, what about when you’re married? You think it’ll just get better? What if that special guy or girl stops going to church? Will you still go? What if they want YOU to stop going? Will you?
If your relationship with God is weak, everything else in your Christian walk will be weaker still. How strong do you expect your relationships to be if God is not at the center? Don’t you think he’s able to take care of you two better than you are?
And hey, you want a strong, Christian guy or girl? Well, if they’re really a strong Christian, they’ll want the same thing. So how is your devotional life? Your prayer life? Do you seek God daily? Cultivate this relationship with God and it will permiate every not only every other relationship, but every single aspect of your life.
Very simple this time around, but it’s the most critical piece of advice I can give any Christian, and it certainly applies in the dating world. Start with God, just like every other venture.
Next Time: Get Strong with Yourself
5 thoughts on “The Only Christian Dating Advice on the Internet (Part 1)”
This is an issue so often avoided! Sure, we’re supposed to marry good Christan spouses, but the formula seems to be a bit vague as to how exactly that should come about. Kudos for tackling a tough, but vital, subject!
Yes, yes, yes. That’s basically one of the reasons I’m single is because my relationship with God right now is the most important thing I can have. And boys are gross.
It’s good to hear that you’re putting the first things first, and by the way, God MADE us gross, so there.
We must not put any thing before God. It took me many tears, heartaces to really undrestand that. I have even learnd how put God before myself now. I am just seeking his direction about a husband he will find me once god feels I am ready! ( KEEP THE BLOGS COMING)
Thanks for the encouragement! Glad you learned that hard lesson.