So it’s Halloween and you have no costume. Your home, workplace, or whatever is filled with monsters, skanks, and obscure references you don’t get. Whether you forgot a costume, couldn’t afford one, or just didn’t care, here are ten surefire answers for that idiot who looks at your jeans and polo and asks, “What are you supposed to be?”
- “I’m Harry Potter wearing an invisibility cloak. What, you don’t see it?”
- “I’ve disguised myself as the man/woman of your dreams. Hello at last.”
- “I’m dressed as [insert obscure or made-up reference here]. You’ve probably never heard of it.”
- “I’m pretending to be someone so offended by the idea of Halloween that I’m wearing normal clothes out of protest.”
- “I’m an undercover CIA agent. Aw, crap, now I have to kill you.”
- “My costume is very complicated [then just start making things up and don’t stop until they leave].”
- “My real costume is under the clothes.” *wink*
- “I’m a zombie who came back to life, put on some makeup, and came to this specific location to hang out with you people.” (Say it with absolute deadpan)
- “I’m Satan. Contrary to popular belief, this is actually my day off.”
- “I’m you.”
Got any others? Put ’em in the comments!
Happy Halloween, everybody.